“Life is short. Have an affair,” proclaimed the first email at the top of my inbox this morning. Sent on behalf of the wildly popular dating service Ashley Madison, their mission-statement is spelled out in their slogan: find a relationship while you’re already in one. A few emails past Ashley in the queue was Christian Mingle, offering to find me a mate on God’s behalf. And if God wasn’t up for the challenge, there was a message from BlackPeopleMeet.com, which as the name states, I fail to satisfy a key demographic of the targeted clientele.  Apparently, my ill-informed spam folder feels that I am in need of an affair, (perhaps with a black woman of good faith), and welcomed those infidels to cross the e-moat. Then it dawned on me – today is Valentine’s Day.

Solid marketing, guys. Hoping to cash in on the aptly nicknamed “Singles Awareness Day” by those not in picture-perfect, He Went to Jared relationships? In full disclosure, I’ve sampled the online-dating world before and it has produced stellar results. (Right, Liz?) Some of my friends have met online, which has led to happy and long-standing relationships, engagements, and marriages. So I am certainly not knocking online dating. As you might have guessed, the real target here is Valentine’s Day.

The holiday has a number of historical origins, rooted in religion, folk lore, and literature to name a few. It is estimated that nearly one billion Valentine’s Day cards (both purchased and homemade) are delivered each year in the United States. With modern day connotations of love, happiness, and a celebration of each other, it might make sense that the sentiment of Valentine’s Day extend beyond a single day. If Jesus and the Easter Bunny have to share a day, how did Valentine’s Day get its own space on the calendar?

While buying groceries this week, two young (30 is young) women in line ahead of me were discussing their hatred of the amorous holiday, citing that they were both the only uncoupled members of their respective friend groups. As I eavesdropped on their conversation, a quick glance around the check-out aisle suddenly had me choking on candy hearts. There were chocolate roses, cheesy cards, and the self-destructive magazine rack boasting topics such as “4 Great Valentine’s Day Outfit Ideas” and “Gorgeous Valentine’s Day Lingerie.” Suddenly, I felt guilty for being part of a holiday that can so effectively isolate others.

So rather than making Valentine’s Day just about romance (or a lack thereof), it just may be the perfect opportunity to take stock of those around you. Acknowledge those who bring joy and happiness to your life, make your day-to-day more rewarding, and simply thank them for it. While it may be a parent, friend, or significant other, anyone can truly be yours. And as Ashley Madison reminds us, everyone could use one more Valentine.

Perhaps equally rewarding is to use this time to purge dead-weight from your life. The acquaintances who run into you and say repeatedly, “We should get together!” and then never follow through. Guess what? They don’t care enough to make it happen. The guy that’s been jerking you around for months? He’s not going to commit. The dramatic friend who is always in self-proclaimed crisis? He can figure it out on his own. Draw back Cupid’s bow, line up a head shot, and clean house of bad energy. It’ll leave more time for the people that matter.

In perfect conclusion to this entry, Liz just joined me for a drink. Flustered, she opened with, “I went to CVS to get you a Valentine’s Day card, and the card aisle was packed, and I got caught up in the ridiculousness of the holiday and bailed. I feel bad. Hope you don’t mind.”

Nope. Not at all…